Men In Love

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Her explanations of the psychology of kinky practices were so bizarre at some points they were hard for me to wrap my head around. and forget her, their friendship and feelings of masculinity somehow reinforced at the woman’s expense. Friday mentions in the introduction that she has digested sexual taboos from women as empowering and progressive but when faced with the same taboos in men's fantasies she was scandalized and disgusted. Those fantasies which did not have any outright turnoffs were much too short for me to work up much of a hot and bother (something Nancy explains is normal since men don't take nearly as long to get there, or stay there as long one they've arrived). At birth infants are so undifferentiated that they have the capacity to receive erotic stimulation at every aperture of the body and any area of skin: from either or both sexes; from animals, food, objects, colors, currents of air, gradations of temperature.

My only reason for missing out on the five star mark is because I didn't manage to read the whole book as I was in a rush to lend it out and because not all of Miss Friday's psychoanalysis sounds believable, often I get the feeling she ought to have just written . Friday's worldview is heavily colored by Freudian psychoanalysis, and Freud can die in a fire as far as I'm concerned, so I was often dubious and critical of her analyses, most of which stemmed from the following idea: boys want to have sex with their mothers, and view their father as a sexual rival who they're afraid will castrate them. Even these fantasies, in a twisted way, were usually still focused on the woman's consent and pleasure. The men are not repulsed by women's bodies, genitalia (or even anuses), pubic hair, effluvia, or uninhibited sexual desire or pleasure - quite the opposite. I laughed out loud when she said that women are repulsed by M/M, because (she says) a woman is threatened by the idea that a man could want to be with another man rather than with her.A guy might get off on these fantasies, but personally reading the stories was not something I found to be a turn-on.

Considering that AO3 has twice as many M/M stories as M/F stories, and fanfiction is almost exclusively written by women, that sure has changed.I wish I could remember who said this, but this book also affirms one of the first things I read when I discovered radical feminism, which was "We will never fuck our way out of the patriarchy. Love and sex are two different things, as long as you keep that in mind as well as an open mind this book is pretty damned good! Instead of a range of sexual fantasies from gay men which would be no less fascinating and complex as the fantasies of straight men, we get an essay on the psychological underpinnings of homosexual identity.

One always wonders if the letters printed were selected to fit her theory, or the latter arose to describe the data. Quite the opposite of feeling there was anything angry or resentful towards women in (almost all of) these fantasies, it was surprising and wonderful to me to see that, at least in this sampling, men's sexual fantasies are very very focused on women's enthusiastic consent and on women deriving maximum pleasure from sex, literally as much pleasure as the man can imagine. An extraordinary, explicitly masculine journey, Men In Love develops a startlingly honest portrayal of what it means to be a man in contemporary America. Anyhow, the book is ok if you're lonely on a weekend and want to pretend you're doing something intellectual while keeping yourself company.

A majority of the men in this book don't even act out their fantasies or the fantasies are linked to experiences that they wished went "another way" so to speak. How must it feel to be the gender that has a sexual organ considered so nasty that nobody, not even the woman who says she loves you, wants to look at it? no signs of cover wear, clean glossy, pages clean, bright and unmarked, spine tightListing Includes Books Image.

Rather than merely an unfiltered compilation of letters detailing male sexual fantasies, Friday synthesizes them around a given theme--say, oral sex or sadomasochism--into an explanation of how they arise and what they signify. Though the author's explanations give the impression of being presumptuous at certain points, nancy tried to be objective in most cases and the book in overall is very riveting. Coming out of a lifetime of predominantly heterosexual feelings and actions, many men are bewildered, puzzled and dismayed to find themselves heated by notions of including another male in their eroticism. However, given the total lack of individuality of anyone in these fantasies beyond the men themselves, it could also be argued that the men in this book value pleasing women only superficially: only as long as the women are their automata, existing only on the man's terms and not their own, doing exactly what he wants and liking it. It is women controlling our own reproduction - not women talking themselves into having more sex in the name of "liberation" - that is where our power against patriarchy lies.In creating this historic study, Nancy Friday listened–without disapproval, apology or censorship–to the candid responses of thousands of men aged fourteen through sixty. Most of the fantasies were between vaguely and actively repulsive to me to read, and they were all so. Nancy Friday, better known for her writings on female sexual fantasies, turns her attention to the opposite sex in Men in Love. Forever after men sense the forbidding shadow of the primitive, preoedipal mother behind every woman to whom they are attracted. Nancy Friday established herself as a magazine journalist in New York, England, Italy, and France before turning to writing full time and publishing her first book, My Secret Garden, in 1973, which became a bestseller.